August 30, 2007

Chapter 30d: Strangetown Stories

Strangetown Stories, Part 4 someone who's just strange.

Hopefully everyone knows Jean Rene by now. It not, page back to Salina's wedding or over to Orrin's modeling session and you'll get to experience him in his full bad accent glory. *grin* I thought we'd spend a little time with Jean Rene and his faithful hound Miss Cleo before wrapping this chapter up.

Originally I'd intended Shelby to re-do the Holldum estate and Jean Rene was going to be the interior designer. Fortunately, I scrapped that plan, but it left me with Jean Rene here roaming freely about. I did find some spots to use him and as he got played more I discovered he's really quite the character. He's maxxed neat and outgoing with no playful points and only 2 or 3 nice points. No wonder he's such a character *chuckle*

And yes, he kept teasing Miss Cleo by acting like he was throwing the stick and hiding it behind his back.

When he did throw it, it was into the middle of the street. Good thing there's no traffic right now.

Jean Rene had a falling out with the salon he was working for after the little incident with Salina's hair, so he decided he was going to open his own salon in the front room of his little place.

"Zey failed to recognize ze true magnifique of ze skillz of Jean Rene."

Unfortunately, the "skillz" of Jean Rene did not include any hair styling badges.

"Sacre Bleu!"

Perhaps he should've stayed with the salon long enough to earn a couple.

Regardless, he soon had a line of people waiting for makeovers.

His most recent customers: Genesis Retrorocket, the town slob (whose name I don't recall) and Case's mom Carlotta Deerfield (the town *clears throat*).

In fact, all sorts of people started showing up.

Captain, you can't be seriously considering it.

(The Sim-Captain was part of Jean Rene's welcome wagon too. I'm beginning to think she organizes the thing.)

Apparently she was more than just considering it.

"Come. Ven I am fini vit you, vous will be magnifique!"

Do we want to know what you're pointing at there Jean Rene? You might want to be careful where you aim that finger.

Magnifique? Um... you sure there?


You'd better hurry and try that again, before one of the MBiBs show up to defend the Captain's honor.

For the most part though, he does pretty well at making people over. He managed to convince Lola that a little blush on the cheeks made her look a million times better and was worth sixty simoleons.

And he talked the soon-to-be-college-bound Clara Curious into trying a little color in her dreads. I like the look, but we might have to find her some new clothes.

Indirectly speaking of alien offspring though...

Something unexpected happened after Jean Rene closed the salon and decided to unwind with a bit of stargazing.

I'm not sure why aliens would be interested in Jean Rene, really. I mean, they don't usually have hair to be concerned about and I can't imagine they'd be too interested in makeup tips.

They apparently realized this and tossed him back shortly before dawn.

How about a close up of him?

I felt sorry for him for about half a second... and then I zoomed in and had to giggle at that expression.

Not being a knowledge sim, you'd expect Jean Rene here to be pretty upset about his whole ordeal. Most other non-knowledge sims are, but Faux Frenchie here? He's more concerned over whether or not he still looks good.

"Ah, I am still ze prettiest hair artiste in zis town."

Yeah, well, we'll see if you still think you're still the prettiest in a couple days. Y'know I'm beginning to wonder here. Three abductions and a werewolfing? One of any of those I could see a normal random occurrence, but all four? That can't be coincidence. It seems almost planned... coordinated...

Hmmm... you don't think....

'Cuse me a moment...

*tappity tappity tappity*

"That part went exceedingly well. Beyond my expectations..."

*tappity tappity*

"I think next I shall try...



*tappity tappity*

"Oh! Better still, I believe next I shall arrange for..."

*tappity tap tappity*




*tappity tap tapp*



"Woman! Gah! Would you cease with the sneaking up and screaming at me? I could have sworn I made a declaration that Evil Overlords were to be afforded privacy when working out our plans for domination."

The only time privacy's been mentioned was in relation to your personal needs and... well... I could see both your hands on the keyboard so I knew it didn't apply in this situation. As for you and your plans...

"And I have told you that my machinations are of no concern of yours."

Actually, they kind of are. Do I want to ask why you've been phone stalking SK? Should I be worried? And why do I have this suspicion that you may able to explain the unfortunate happenings of several of your neighbors.

"Me? How could I explain any mishaps or abductions that may have occurred to others? Are you assuming that I had something with whatever happened to these pains in my... er... people? I've been right here at Hoh house since returning from Salina's wedding, finishing my manifesto, ah term paper."

So you had nothing to do with Pascal and Vidcund being abducted?

"They took both of them? Dammit, they were only supposed to take the one who manhandles voyeurs."

Ah ha! I thought I smelled your cheesy little fingers in this.

"Ooo cheese... er... By the Great Wheel of Cheddar, I am telling you I had nothing to do with this."

Uh-huh. Sure.

"If I did have something to do with this, which I of course did not, I would have only arranged to have only the second brother abducted, as he is a terror to anyone in the neighborhood with a telescope."

Okay then, assuming you actually didn't arrange any of this, if you had somehow planned for Headmaster Gibson to get up close and personal with Jasper, the general of your elite shock troops, it would be because... *gestures vaguely*

"His antics in the hot tub with Omaha's mother caused her much distress. Caused Omaha that is, not Shelby."

Even though Shelby was the instigator of the entire hot tub situation.

"I would never command one of my legion to savage a pregnant woman."

How gentlemanly of you.

"Unless it was you."

Gee, thanks. *end dripping sarcasm* I don't suppose you'd care to enlighten me with the reason why you had Jean Rene abducted, not that you did or ever would.

"No one calls an Evil Overlord their little cabbage."

Except I don't recall Jean Rene calling you that. He did call you 'mon cheri' and 'mon ami', but not 'mon petit chou'. Now 'mon petit fromage', I could understand...

"I didn't say it was when we were at the salon. Speaking of which, I'm still in those damned leather pants you found."

We like you in those leather pants and... leather anything else *smirk*

"Grrr... wait! We who?"

Nothing, nothing... Well, since you didn't have anything to do with any of the chaos that's been going on in the rest of Strangetown, I guess I shouldn't worry about telling you that because of all this, I'm not going to be able to put you on the fast track to graduation.

"The... fast track to graduation?"

I was going to hurry you through all your classes, have you influence people to do your term papers, and pretty much rush you to graduation so I could get Omaha pledged in and you moved back to the main house, but what with all these impending babies.. It might be ages before I get around to playing you again. That's how I know you couldn't have arranged any of this. I mean, what Evil Overlord worth his salt would sabotage his own rise to the throne like this?


What was that?


Okay then. Since I'm convinced you're not the one behind all this, I'm outta here.

"Wait, where are you going?"

Gotta go check in with Texas again before I wrap up. *FAMP!* Enjoy the cheese. I'll talk to you later. *smirks*

"Damn you Woman, get back here! I..."

Whew, that could've gotten ugly. We'll let Orrin stew a bit. Who knows, I may still put him on the fast track. But lets look in on Texas once more before the end.

"I wuz a wonderin when ya'd done be poppin in back here. I'm beginnin ta git surriously worried about mah second boy chile here."

Kasson still isn't back? Okay, now this isn't like him. A couple days I could see, but how long's it been?

"I done called his office three-four times, but they still hain't heard nuthin from him. And I left jes as many message over at Miz Keth's place, but she haint' called me back neither."

And that's unlike SK. If Kasson was hanging out over at her place, as soon as she found you were worried about him she'd call to let you know he was okay. She wouldn't necessarily send him back over, but she'd certainly call.

"Ya don' reckin they both could be a missin, do ya?"

Both of them? What could've happened to cause both of them to go missing? Wait, don't answer that. Orrin.

"Whut does Waylon's boy haf ta do with it?"

He's been up to some... antics... across Strangetown lately. And when I checked in on SK earlier she was on the phone with him. She told me he'd been calling a lot lately. I even accused him of phone stalking her.

"But jes why would Orry want ta do sumthin ta Miz Keth an his own flesh 'n blood?"

Well SK is my avatar, at least until the wedding. Since he can't get to me directly, maybe he went for the indirect route. And if Kasson happened to be with her at the time...

"He done better not have! Waylon is gonna have ta have a long talk with that boy, jes as soon as I git done having a long talk wit Waylon!"

Yeah, I think I'm going to go have a little chat with Mr. Orrin again myself.

*thump thump*

*thump thump*

"Now jes who'd be a callin on us at this here time a night?"

You've got me Texas.


Chapter 30c: Strangetown Stories

Strangetown Stories, Part 3

We're back Texas. You and Waylon enjoy the hot tub?

"Hey Keth. Yup, me 'n Waylon shure did. Didja ya know what ya kin in do in them ja-koozies?"

Yeah, I think we're well aware of what goes in a hot tub Texas.

"I ne'er woulda figgered mah sweetie ta be up fer hijinks like that, but once he'd bin a soakin a while an got limmered up he got these here notions an..."

Er, Texas, you two used to do that all the time in the hot tub in college. You didn't forget, did you?

"Ah... I guess it did done slip mah mind. Since we ain't had no hot tub here afore."

Heh. I'm glad your enjoying it. Just... no visuals, please.

"I'll tell ya what I done be enjoyin more. That's be harrangin mah next wedding, but Kasson still hain't shown up at the house yet."

He hasn't? Are you sure you haven't missed him?

"Yeppers. Me 'n Waylon's been busy, but not that busy. He's jes clean gone. He hain't shown up since you done talkered to him them two-three days ago."

Maybe he's on a business trip. He is a political big wig here.

"I done called his office."

And what'd they say?

"He tole 'em tha he'd be outta tha office fer a few days but shure didn't tell 'em what he wuz doin or anything."

Did you try SK? I talked to her just the other day. Orrin's been ringing her phone off the hook. I gotta remember to tell him to quit it.

"Yeah, and I done got that answerin machine of hers. I left a message, but she hain't called me back yet."

Did you call during the day?

"Well a'course I done did."

SK works during the day. She probably hasn't had a chance to give you call. Or...


Or Kasson's over there with her and they're enjoying some post-engagement private time.

"Well tha boy kin give his mama a call once hinna while an let her know he's doin fine and that he'll be back soon so they kin start in on his weddin plans. An' I'll reminder him of that when I done give 'em a call over there agin tamorraw"

*chuckles* You do that Texas. I'll check back with you later to see how it went.

And now to someone who's not quite so well loved around town. I'm sure there are many of you who would be thrilled to see Strangetown's finest take Miz Shelby in on whatever charges could be concocted for her, but I'm afraid that's not the case here.

See, earlier today one of Strangetown's aspiring busineswomen was feeling very lonely (and also very whale-like). Having left her lil chi-hooa-hooa behind when she moved, she gave a call to the Strangetown Animal Shelter to see if they could bring her over a new furry friend.

The nice Animal Officer showed up with Baxter a short while later. Baxter is an elder Tibetan terrier, looking for a place to retire and enjoy his aging years.

When Shelby brought up the "small dogs" tab when she called the shelter, I did a double take followed by a loud WTF? Baxter's picture in there was very... interesting. *chuckle* But he's a very sweet and playful dog, always looking for attention or someone to play fetch with him. I'm thinking about getting him a lady friend so he can have a litter or two of pups before he passes over.

Unfortunately, Baxter was still not enough to perk up the whale, so Shelby gave Headmaster Matthew a call. He happily accepted and really sort of surprised me.

Usually the headmasters are kind of grumpy, surly, and downright unfriendly, even when not doing the private school tours. The only headmaster my sims have ever been able to make friends with has been Headmaster Korey Jivatzawhahoozavitz (Headmaster Vince Clortho in the default neighborhood - he's the balding one) So when Matthew was attentive and affectionate to Shelby, I was pretty surprised.

If he wasn't flirting with Shelby, he was talking to and playing with her belly. And when Shelby was off doing something else he was playing with Baxter. Considering how easily Shelby lured him into woohoo, I figured he was a romance sim but the way he's acting makes me think that he's maybe family instead.

Shelby apparently suspected this as well, or else she was just really touched by his attention, as she decided now was probably a good time to ask the headmaster a certain question.

A question he couldn't say no to, even when she stuck her fingers right through the jeweler's box in her haste. Headmasters don't get propositioned by their clients very often, unless their clients are legacy folk (which Shelby isn't anymore)

This is probably going to make some of the Shelby-haters out there unhappy, but I have to admit these two are kinda cute together. Shelby was never overly thrilled when Cleveland tried to be romantic with her.

Of course, it could also be that the pregnancy hormones are getting to Shelby.

Luckily, despite her size Shelby still has most of the next day before she pops, so we're able to throw a tiny little 'friends and family' ceremony for the whale and her betrothed (Captain Ahab?). It's only right that Omaha and Treynor be there for their mother when she gets married again.

I was impressed that Treynor showed up when she invited him. He's not furious with her anymore but their relationship is still pretty negative. He even happily accepted a hug from her, so maybe they can mend some fences here.

Shelby had to chase down Omaha in order to give her a hug. Yes, this is the main bathroom in the house and yes, there are four people in here, one of them trying to do their business. That's Jean Rene in the Nehru jacket; he was part of Shelby's welcome wagon a while ago, so I had her ring him up. And that's her co-worker, Houston Cody, that Jean Rene seems so interested in watching do his business. Y'all may remember Houston as the guy Shelby was flirting with when Kasson caught her. Since Treynor was there too, he's got a few issues with Mr. Cody as well.

Shelby doesn't have a lot of friends on her own, and as a result her career is being curtailed by a serious lack of family friends. Among the people at her wedding, two of them are from her welcome wagon (Jean Rene and Jodie Larson. Captain Angelia was the 3rd person... go figure. The Capt'n, however, made it clear she did not want to be her friend), the burglar is here (Amin), and so is the guy who keeps calling to invite her downtown (Adam). She also has some coworkers here, namely Houston Cody and Malcom Landgraab.

Sheesh Jean Rene, we realize you don't find Amin the Burglar attractive but we're not asking you to propose to him.

Oh, and there's one person who's not real thrilled about being forced asked to attend.

"And why am I here? I don't like Shelby. We're not friends and Omaha and Treynor don't need the moral support."

I explained to you before, once you're married you'll lose your Sim-deity given powers and I won't have an avatar to put in an appearance at weddings and parties anymore. So I'm trying to get all the use out of you I can before that happens. Now put on a smile and get back to mingling.

I swear, I have never had a sim whine and grouse about being pregnant as much as Shelby. She's often doing the "oh my back aches" routine, usually when people are around to notice and pay attention to her when she does.

At least she decided it would best if she didn't wear white to the wedding *chuckle*

Oh Matthew, and here I thought you were the manly sort of headmaster. I guess we know who'll be wearing the pants in this family (even though she's in a skirt currently)

And so Headmaster Matthew Gibson becomes Matthew Zaidi-Gibson. Why couldn't you have had the last name Coe? Then you guys could've been the Zaidi-Coes. Of course, then I'd have to move both of you to New Simleans and get you in the music career.

Oh, it turned out that Matthew is a knowledge sim. Apparently with family sim tendencies though.

Would you believe this is a roof raiser party? Yeah, I can't explain it either. The only thing I can think of is because so few people in attendance knew each other, there were lots of relationship points being earned.

I suppose a little TV watching didn't hurt things either. It's like the only fun thing thing in the entire house. Shelby's a bit short on furniture and Matthew only brought about 5k into the house. With the little one on the way, most of that will probably go for baby things.

Yes yes Jean Rene, we know. You don't like TV, you don't like sports, and you don't have animals as one of the topics you like to talk about. Just get your fingers out of your ears because my heir wants to talk to you, for some bizarre reason.

Well the party was a roof raiser so Captain Ahab and the Whale went on their honeymoon. And what did they do when they got back? Heh. You're looking at it. Matthew did conveniently spin up a want for baby though.

Matthew took some time out from job hunting (I was hoping to get him in the education career) to play with their party crasher. Orrin's general Jasper decided to drop by for a visit. Matthew, don't you know it's dangerous to make friends with the Master of the Pack.

Eventually the happy couple retired to the bedroom for a little post-honeymoon woohoo, which helped bring on labor for Shelby. Matthew, what are you sleeping for? You're an educated sim. Get up and help your wife!

*sigh Another useless sim male.

Fortunately, having done this twice before, Shelby has an idea what to do. This is David Zaidi-Gibson. I don't know what I would've done if she'd had twins; there's not enough room in the house for more than one baby right now.

Matthew seems pretty excited about the new member of the family. Must be that latent family sim side of him popping up again.

Actually, Matthew turned out to be pretty good with taking care of David, doing a lot of things autonomously with him. Just thought I'd drop that in here in case I don't post about these guys again.

And compared to when Omaha and Treynor were little, Shelby is being a good mother this time around, paying more attention to him than she did to her previous two. Who knows, maybe she's actually changed.

Matthew, rather than heading back to bed, decided to go fix himself a little something to eat. Our party crasher Jasper was still there, hanging out and playing with Baxter's chew toy.

And Jasper was apparently a little hungry.

Oh dear...

Jasper! WTF were you thinking?!

::By Your Command::

My command? I didn't command you to do anything, you silly wolf. I... wait a minute. Hmmm... I wonder if I'm starting to see a pattern here.

*sighs* Oh don't just sit there and stare at it Matthew, go put some bactine or something on it. Not like it'll do much good.

I sure hope the education career track doesn't have a night job, otherwise this could be a problem.

Am I a bad Simmer if I think that Matthew looks better as a werewolf than as a human? *chuckle* For being a knowledge sim, he sure didn't seem thrilled about having been turned into a Were, but he didn't seem too upset by it either. He just headed over and resumed making something to eat.

Jasper, on the other hand, continues on his mission to terrorize the household. After getting growled at by Jasper, Shelby spun up the want to cure Matthew of lycanthropy (she used to spin similar wants for Cleveland and vampirism). She also scolded Jasper after he was done barking at her and cowed the poor wulfie.

Too bad she didn't stick around the kitchen for a while. I put little David's crib and changing table in the alcove of the kitchen, so he'd be close to the fridge for bottles. After Shelby and Matthew returned to bed, Jasper began growing at David in the crib. He kept the growing and barking up for an hour (sim time). I've never seen a dog or a wolf do this to a baby before; I've always seen them be friendly to babies and toddlers, even if they're strangers. *boggle*

Let's move on from the strange and suspicious antics by our community wolves...