Chapter 30d: Strangetown Stories

Strangetown Stories, Part 4



...to someone who's just strange.

Hopefully everyone knows Jean Rene by now. It not, page back to Salina's wedding or over to Orrin's modeling session and you'll get to experience him in his full bad accent glory. *grin* I thought we'd spend a little time with Jean Rene and his faithful hound Miss Cleo before wrapping this chapter up.

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Originally I'd intended Shelby to re-do the Holldum estate and Jean Rene was going to be the interior designer. Fortunately, I scrapped that plan, but it left me with Jean Rene here roaming freely about. I did find some spots to use him and as he got played more I discovered he's really quite the character. He's maxxed neat and outgoing with no playful points and only 2 or 3 nice points. No wonder he's such a character *chuckle*

And yes, he kept teasing Miss Cleo by acting like he was throwing the stick and hiding it behind his back.

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When he did throw it, it was into the middle of the street. Good thing there's no traffic right now.

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Jean Rene had a falling out with the salon he was working for after the little incident with Salina's hair, so he decided he was going to open his own salon in the front room of his little place.

"Zey failed to recognize ze true magnifique of ze skillz of Jean Rene."

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Unfortunately, the "skillz" of Jean Rene did not include any hair styling badges.

"Sacre Bleu!"

Perhaps he should've stayed with the salon long enough to earn a couple.

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Regardless, he soon had a line of people waiting for makeovers.

His most recent customers: Genesis Retrorocket, the town slob (whose name I don't recall) and Case's mom Carlotta Deerfield (the town *clears throat*).

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In fact, all sorts of people started showing up.

Captain, you can't be seriously considering it.

(The Sim-Captain was part of Jean Rene's welcome wagon too. I'm beginning to think she organizes the thing.)

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Apparently she was more than just considering it.

"Come. Ven I am fini vit you, vous will be magnifique!"

Do we want to know what you're pointing at there Jean Rene? You might want to be careful where you aim that finger.

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Magnifique? Um... you sure there?

"Merde."

You'd better hurry and try that again, before one of the MBiBs show up to defend the Captain's honor.

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For the most part though, he does pretty well at making people over. He managed to convince Lola that a little blush on the cheeks made her look a million times better and was worth sixty simoleons.

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And he talked the soon-to-be-college-bound Clara Curious into trying a little color in her dreads. I like the look, but we might have to find her some new clothes.

Indirectly speaking of alien offspring though...

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Something unexpected happened after Jean Rene closed the salon and decided to unwind with a bit of stargazing.

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I'm not sure why aliens would be interested in Jean Rene, really. I mean, they don't usually have hair to be concerned about and I can't imagine they'd be too interested in makeup tips.

They apparently realized this and tossed him back shortly before dawn.

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How about a close up of him?

I felt sorry for him for about half a second... and then I zoomed in and had to giggle at that expression.

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Not being a knowledge sim, you'd expect Jean Rene here to be pretty upset about his whole ordeal. Most other non-knowledge sims are, but Faux Frenchie here? He's more concerned over whether or not he still looks good.

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"Ah, I am still ze prettiest hair artiste in zis town."

Yeah, well, we'll see if you still think you're still the prettiest in a couple days. Y'know I'm beginning to wonder here. Three abductions and a werewolfing? One of any of those I could see a normal random occurrence, but all four? That can't be coincidence. It seems almost planned... coordinated...

Hmmm... you don't think....

'Cuse me a moment...

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*tappity tappity tappity*

"That part went exceedingly well. Beyond my expectations..."

*tappity tappity*

"I think next I shall try...

*tappity*

Ahem.

*tappity tappity*

"Oh! Better still, I believe next I shall arrange for..."

*tappity tap tappity*


Orrin.


Waylon.


Seavey.


*tappity tap tapp*

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ORRIN!

*tappitklitterklitterklitter...*

"Woman! Gah! Would you cease with the sneaking up and screaming at me? I could have sworn I made a declaration that Evil Overlords were to be afforded privacy when working out our plans for domination."

The only time privacy's been mentioned was in relation to your personal needs and... well... I could see both your hands on the keyboard so I knew it didn't apply in this situation. As for you and your plans...

"And I have told you that my machinations are of no concern of yours."

Actually, they kind of are. Do I want to ask why you've been phone stalking SK? Should I be worried? And why do I have this suspicion that you may able to explain the unfortunate happenings of several of your neighbors.

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"Me? How could I explain any mishaps or abductions that may have occurred to others? Are you assuming that I had something with whatever happened to these pains in my... er... people? I've been right here at Hoh house since returning from Salina's wedding, finishing my manifesto, ah term paper."

So you had nothing to do with Pascal and Vidcund being abducted?

"They took both of them? Dammit, they were only supposed to take the one who manhandles voyeurs."

Ah ha! I thought I smelled your cheesy little fingers in this.

"Ooo cheese... er... By the Great Wheel of Cheddar, I am telling you I had nothing to do with this."

Uh-huh. Sure.

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"If I did have something to do with this, which I of course did not, I would have only arranged to have only the second brother abducted, as he is a terror to anyone in the neighborhood with a telescope."

Okay then, assuming you actually didn't arrange any of this, if you had somehow planned for Headmaster Gibson to get up close and personal with Jasper, the general of your elite shock troops, it would be because... *gestures vaguely*

"His antics in the hot tub with Omaha's mother caused her much distress. Caused Omaha that is, not Shelby."

Even though Shelby was the instigator of the entire hot tub situation.

"I would never command one of my legion to savage a pregnant woman."

How gentlemanly of you.

"Unless it was you."

Gee, thanks. *end dripping sarcasm* I don't suppose you'd care to enlighten me with the reason why you had Jean Rene abducted, not that you did or ever would.

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"No one calls an Evil Overlord their little cabbage."

Except I don't recall Jean Rene calling you that. He did call you 'mon cheri' and 'mon ami', but not 'mon petit chou'. Now 'mon petit fromage', I could understand...

"I didn't say it was when we were at the salon. Speaking of which, I'm still in those damned leather pants you found."

We like you in those leather pants and... leather anything else *smirk*

"Grrr... wait! We who?"

Nothing, nothing... Well, since you didn't have anything to do with any of the chaos that's been going on in the rest of Strangetown, I guess I shouldn't worry about telling you that because of all this, I'm not going to be able to put you on the fast track to graduation.

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"The... fast track to graduation?"

I was going to hurry you through all your classes, have you influence people to do your term papers, and pretty much rush you to graduation so I could get Omaha pledged in and you moved back to the main house, but what with all these impending babies.. It might be ages before I get around to playing you again. That's how I know you couldn't have arranged any of this. I mean, what Evil Overlord worth his salt would sabotage his own rise to the throne like this?

"@&$#%$%!!"

What was that?

"Nothing."

Okay then. Since I'm convinced you're not the one behind all this, I'm outta here.

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"Wait, where are you going?"

Gotta go check in with Texas again before I wrap up. *FAMP!* Enjoy the cheese. I'll talk to you later. *smirks*

"Damn you Woman, get back here! I..."

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Whew, that could've gotten ugly. We'll let Orrin stew a bit. Who knows, I may still put him on the fast track. But lets look in on Texas once more before the end.

"I wuz a wonderin when ya'd done be poppin in back here. I'm beginnin ta git surriously worried about mah second boy chile here."

Kasson still isn't back? Okay, now this isn't like him. A couple days I could see, but how long's it been?

"I done called his office three-four times, but they still hain't heard nuthin from him. And I left jes as many message over at Miz Keth's place, but she haint' called me back neither."

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And that's unlike SK. If Kasson was hanging out over at her place, as soon as she found you were worried about him she'd call to let you know he was okay. She wouldn't necessarily send him back over, but she'd certainly call.

"Ya don' reckin they both could be a missin, do ya?"

Both of them? What could've happened to cause both of them to go missing? Wait, don't answer that. Orrin.

"Whut does Waylon's boy haf ta do with it?"

He's been up to some... antics... across Strangetown lately. And when I checked in on SK earlier she was on the phone with him. She told me he'd been calling a lot lately. I even accused him of phone stalking her.

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"But jes why would Orry want ta do sumthin ta Miz Keth an his own flesh 'n blood?"

Well SK is my avatar, at least until the wedding. Since he can't get to me directly, maybe he went for the indirect route. And if Kasson happened to be with her at the time...

"He done better not have! Waylon is gonna have ta have a long talk with that boy, jes as soon as I git done having a long talk wit Waylon!"

Yeah, I think I'm going to go have a little chat with Mr. Orrin again myself.

*thump thump*

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*thump thump*

"Now jes who'd be a callin on us at this here time a night?"

You've got me Texas.

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