February 16, 2006

Chapter 6d: Carla without a K

Carla without a K

When we left our lovelorn heir last chapter, his dear sister was telling him that she could set him up with her friend Carla. Figuring that any friend of Salina's couldn't be too bad, I gave her the go ahead to invite her over.

Besides, after Jane's FBP last chapter, what more could go wrong?

And as always, the thumbnail pics pop to larger images

Er, maybe we shouldn't have been waving the "what could go wrong" red flag in front of the bull known as Fate. Salina, you didn't tell us that your friend is also known as Contessa Carla. Where'd you meet her, anyway?

"I wuz out dancin' with... ah... Phemey's brother at that Crypt nightclub. We started talkin' while waitin' fer a turn in the dancin' sphere."

I see. So you were cheating on your fiancée with your future brother-in-law when you met a vampire.

"Hey, she's real nice an' I think she 'n Clevey wuld have fun tagither."

I don't know. She's, well, a vampire. You know, all that turning into bats and spontaneously combusting in sunlight sorta stuff.

"Excuse me Keth, but this is my date and Lina set it up for me. I'm not going to hurt my sister by turning down her friend. Besides, Carla is kind of pretty."

Fine, fine. Date away. I won't stop you then.

So, after a bit of chatting, Cleveland asked Carla out on a date and they headed down to the Crypt O' Night club (where else would you take a vampire?). They're actually hitting it off fairly well so far, but we're still a bit early in the date to tell. Cleveland got along okay with the plant chick and even with the evil Jane at the start of the date. Let's see how dinner goes.

"Before you ask, yes my mother does do the 'Grill of the Golden West' show for the Yummy Channel. And don't even get me started on her 'Unified Grilled Cheese Theory'. Between her theories and my father's belief that noodlesoothers are trying to conquer the world..."

"If your father has seen the truth behind Baron Noodle, Lord of the Noodlehootchies, he is truly a wise man. It would be interesting to meet such an extraordinary person; he must be as fascinating as his son."

"Ah... well... er..."

Oh my my... Carla's rendered Cleveland speechless. That's a first. And it would seem that Waylon's delusions about the noodlehootchie may not be too far off base. (or would that be 'secret base'?)

Oh, and a question to anyone who regularly plays the Crypt O' Night club. Do you have problems with the outdoor tables with the candles (the ones that Cleveland and Carla are at)? Anytime my sims are seated at them, when the waiter delivers the food it disappears off the table. I don't know if it’s an issue with the candles taking up too much on the table or if the table doesn't work right in a downtown setting. I've been slowly replacing them in all my downtown neighborhoods (when I remember to, that is)

So, as a total surprise to me, these two are hitting it off great. Lots of spontaneous stuff (joking, congratulating, even some flirting) and a little snuggly in the photo booth (no woohoo, but romantic pictures). I'm just not understanding it. All the downtown special NPCs are pleasure sims, so there's no aspiration attraction between the two.

"...so the octopus gets up on all eight legs, walks around the bagpipes a couple of times, and jumps on it. Then he walks around it a couple more times and jumps up and down on it a few more times. The bartender says, 'There I knew I could find an instrument he couldn't play.' The Guy replies 'Now just wait a minute He'll play it just as soon as he figures out he can't WooHoo with it.'"

"You say your brother told you this joke? I'd love to meet him. He has a wicked sense of humour, just like you."

Cleveland, are you blushing?

Before the date ran out, I decided to have Cleveland ask Carla what turns her on, to try to figure out what was sparking the attraction between the two. I wasn't too terribly surprised to find out that red hair gets her all hot and bothered, but Cleveland's turn off is vampirism. Whatever strange chemistry these have two paid off though as the night wrapped up with a dream date with them both seriously crushing on each other.

Oh, and I love that pose of Cleveland's. Outgoing sims, ya gotta love 'em. They have no shame.

Do you know the scary thing about this shot? Yeah, I know Nervous can make some scary faces at times, but that's not it. No, it's the fact that one of the guys I used to work with at Bank One danced the exact same way. Same facial expression, same 'white man's overbite'. Now that I think about it, slap a pair of glasses (and a different haircut) on Nervous and you'd have my former coworker. *shudder*

So, like I said, Cleveland and Carla's first date ended in a dream and it seems to me that she knows the way to a knowledge sim's heart. She left him a telescope as a gift (yay, more opportunities to peep on Vidcund!) He kept spinning up wants to do things with Carla, so I sent 'em back downtown for another date. I wasn't too surprised when they started smooching after the taxi drove away.

I was, however, a little surprised when she used her vampire mojo on him. I thought vamps found sims with high logic harder to put the bite on. Cleveland's logic is maxxed, so I figured it'd be a while before Carla tried to fang him, not the second date.

Poor guy. He falls in love; she zaps him with the purple eye rays. He's still so ga-ga over falling in love that he probably thinks the pretty colors and funny feeling are all part of the process.

Ooo. Owww. Carla, I don't think his body is supposed to bend like that.

Alright, which one of you out there was thinking "Damn, he's flexible" ? My Simmy Sense was tingling.

Nice hang time Cleveland. Have you considered a career in the SBA (Sim Basketball Association)? Their games are mostly at night, so it wouldn't cramp your new vampy lifestyle.

And the gratuitous post-embrace "bleh"

I'm not sure if I like the cyan blue of alien vampires. They look like they've been hanging out in sub-zero temperatures for too long.

Aw hon, don't look at me like that. I didn't plan this.

"This wouldn't have happened if you had stuck to your 'no more blind dates' ruling."

She was Salina's friend. How was I to know she was one of the undead?

"Isn't that part of your job as my controller, plumbob deity, mouse matron..."

That would be 'mouse mistress'. I'm not married. And you guys have free will for a reason... so unplanned things like this can happen.

"So un 'unplan' it."

Nah, let's run with this for a while. Besides, you'll go into aspiration failure if I cure you right now.

I don't know what kinky topic Carla was talking about here, but Cleveland is having none of it. I never expected Texas to have raised such a stodgy and prudish heir.

Um, Cleveland, you're a vampire now. Standing out in the sun is bad, mmmmKay?

"But we have finals this morning."

Then you are you doing standing there? Run. Run!

I'll admit it. I cheat and synchronize everyone's college clock so they have their finals at the same time. I have enough trouble making sure everyone gets to their classes and does their home work/reports in time. As it is, Kasson still nearly missed his final; his cereal is going to be awfully soggy when he quits whining about being hungry and goes back to finish it.

And Cleveland, what did I tell you about being out in the sun?

"Evil Daystar! It burns!"

Bah. Get inside, the lot of ya.

Apparently becoming a vampire does not increase a sim's common sense. He's slowly developing a terminal sunburn, but does our heir head into the house? No, he parks himself behind the telescope to peep on the mad poker.

"I like my telescope. It was a date gift from Carla, back when she was nice and hadn't turned me into a bloodsucking monster yet."

Bitter, Cleveland?

"I don't care if you are my father's best friend. In the future, I'd suggest thinking twice before high-tailing it over to campus to push people around. Otherwise next time I'll be doing more than just shoving you."

Woo! You tell 'em Cleveland. Boy, Vidcund really has you steamed today... oh, wait... that's smoke from the terminal sunburn you've got going on right now.

Yeah, he's either bitter or pissed (and I don't mean the drunk kind of pissed).

Now that Cleveland's been vampirized, 'food face' happens even more frequently at the kitchen table, much to my delight.

See what I mean. Maybe I should invest in a coffin.

"Kasson sweetie, I'm a little concerned about Cleveland."

*munch munch* "Why's that Phemey?"

"His table manners never used to be this bad until he started hanging around with that Carla woman."

"Are you done sayin' my friend's caused him ta stop being po-lite an' genteel?"

"Oh no Lina, I'm just making an observation. It's just that it seems like he's changed since they started going out."

"Well of course he's different now. He's a vampire. Didn't you guys notice Carla's fangs when she was here?"

"Cirrus, did we ask you for your opinion?"

"Hey!" *glare* "Seriously, how could you not notice? Kasson, you noticed, didn't you?"

*munch munch*

"Aw, that's okay punkin. I 'preciate you tryin' ta figger out whut's wrong wif Clevey. I think he's just done wore himself out wif all his senior projects and datin' Carla and what all."

Okay, so I bought Cleveland a coffin (a nice tealy green one to go with his complexion) Somehow, though, watching a vampire dressed in flannel pjs covered with sheep rise from a coffin fails to invoke a sense of terror. A fit of mad laughter, yes. Terror? Not so much.

Gratuitous Fang Shot.
See what I mean about the complexion? It's unnatural (like being an alien vampire is) Still, he does makes a cute vampire.

Don't ask what he's cheering about. I'm not sure we want to know.

Oooo, I found a new autonomous action that can cause me to dissolve into the giggle-fits.

Cleveland and Kasson are the Primp Kings, only now that Cleveland is a vamp he doesn't cast a reflection. So he'll get mad, 'bleh' the mirror, and then five minutes later try to primp again.

Oh, and the miasma about him? No, he's not burning up. He was out using the telescope during the daytime again and ran his hygiene into the ground. Do they ever learn?

Cleveland's aspiration was starting to tank because all his wants were focused around biting people (and all his fears around passing out, which was happening a lot). He wanted to chomp a relative and... well... Kasson had night class.

After she recovered from her little breakdown, we called the gypsy for a little vamprocillin, bought Salina some foliage, and sent her upstairs for a little make out session with Cirrus. She was all better by the next morning, but Cirrus really really wants to be a vampire now.

Synchronized Smustling. Always a hit at toga parties. Phemey's expression (and the expression of the gal behind her) is just priceless. Maybe I need to send her back to the secret society to tweak those eyes just a little more.

End of semester is drawing to a close, and Kasson wants to throw parties left and right. Phemey's dad Eugene was wandering by at the time, so I had her drag him in as Kasson invited over a couple friends. Cleveland had been spinning up wants to do stuff with Carla again, so we invited her too, to help keep him in the green. I think Cleveland has a perma-fear of passing out now. *chuckle*

Carla, however, appears to not have any wants to do things with Cleveland. Having chomped one Holldum son, she seems to think the other one looks delightfully nummy.

"Yo Carla you're, like, datin' my brother. It ain't right for you to be puttin' the moves on me. Even if you weren't datin' him, I wouldn't like be interested in you. You're one seriously creepy lady."

Someone doesn't like taking "No" for an answer.

"Foolish child. How dare you turn your nose to me? Am I not il contessa della notte? Bleh I say to you. Bleh bleh."

Eugene wasn't about to sit around and let some undead hussy push his future son-in-law around. Unfortunately, he found out that Carla gives as well as she gets.

"Hey! You poked me in the chest!"

Better than a boot to the head Eugene.

Meanwhile, Kasson has retreated to the corner to cry like a little girl.

But it seems that Eugene's confrontation of Carla was just a delaying tactic, to give Cleveland time to get over and give her a piece of his mind. Still, this seems like an awfully strong reaction; why waste good alcohol just to make a statement?

Oh stop with the waterworks Carla. You were never in love with Cleveland; I only ever saw the little floaty hearts from him. Yeah, you may have been sweet on him but...

"Quiet! You do not understand how lonely it is, being il contessa della notte. Cleveland and I, there was potential for a deep relationship and..." *sob*

And you blew it by trying to put the make on his brother. Be thankful it wasn't holy water he tossed at you.

And, when it's all said and done, tears shed and eyes dried, there's lots of furious going around.

Carla is seriously cheesed at Cleveland, because he and everyone else (and their dog) caught her coming on to Kasson...

Cleveland is furious with Carla for cheating on him, even though she was never in love with him...

And... well... Eugene somehow hates himself. WTF?

Is he going to steal his own newspaper when he gets back to Strangetown?

The only people who didn't end up furious with someone else were Kasson and Phemey.

"She blehed me babe. That's, like, sooo creepy."

"That's okay sweetie. I'm here for you."

"She tried to come on to me too, before she put the bleh on me."

"I know love. She's a nasty lady. What does Cleveland see in her?"

Well, Euphemia, I don't think he sees much in her at all right now.

And that wraps up another chapter of excitement from Cham Annya Hoh. On the plus side, Cleveland and Kasson have both graduated (summa cum laude, of course) and are getting ready to throw one heck of a graduation party. On the down side, Carla keeps trying to steal the house newspaper (she gets about halfway to the mailbox before she flees from the sun)

What does the future hold for our heir? Will he find happiness with his red headed delivery babe or will he continue to mourn his lost Carla (or even try to get back with her?) Will Kasson ever get his bubbleblower?

"Babe! You promised!!"


Because of my little crash issue, I have to replay and rescreenshot Chapter 7. Depending on how events go (like I told Cleveland, they have free will for a reason *grin*) it may go really quickly or drag on and on. Of course, if they're really boring I may have to 'influence' a few things to happen (any suggestions? *evil grin*)

Any last words Cleveland?

"Are you going to leave me like this?"

What, standing in the middle of the kitchen? That might be nice; you're really easy on the eyes.

"No, as a vampire."

I don't know. You've got two perma-fears right now: pass out and be cured. I really don't want to see you gibbering on the floor if I cure you. We'll have to see what the next chapter brings.

So Onward! to Chapter 7: The Boys are Back in Town

Onward to Chapter 7: The Boys are Back in Town
Back to Chapter 6c: 3 Dates for Brother Cleveland


At 2/17/2006 12:45 AM, Anonymous Chuckles said...

This episode had me laughing myself of my chair. I love your writing style, and must catch up on some of the previous chapters of this blog.

At 2/17/2006 2:18 AM, Anonymous Jenn W said...

Great chapter again!! Oopsie on the vamping. But I guess all you have to do now is kill him and zombie-fy him for a point or however many the black sheep is worth!

I swear you must have taken notes from my fiance because one of his favourite lines is "Evil Daystar! It burns!" He says it every day when we walk out of the building to go to work or school if it's sunny out!!

At 2/17/2006 1:07 PM, Anonymous Lisa said...

I loved the crack about "What's he gonna do, steal his own newspaper?" That was great. This whole episode was hilarious. (Good thing the boss wasn't here to hear my cackling.) Thank you so much for the awsome entertainment.

At 2/17/2006 9:26 PM, Blogger Anjel76 said...


This was the craziest and hilarious-est episode yet! Those Holldums! I tell ya! Kasson is still one of my faves. I just love his laid back attitude about things. Loved the whole "Baby, she blehed at me" conversation he had with his chick. *ROTFL*

And poor, poor Cleveland. He doesn't seem to be having much luck with this whole dating thing! And how dare he blame the whole vampirism thing on you! You WARNED him about "il contessa de la notte" (or whatever she calls herself), but he sided with his sister. And now look at him - 1/2 alien, 1/2 vampire. That's right, Cleve-baby. DEAL with it! HEHE!!

And that shot abbout that dude being furious at himself ... *ROTFL* That was fricken hilarious!!!

Great stuff!!

At 2/17/2006 9:32 PM, Blogger PRMami said...

This was great I love it... esp the guy being mad at himself and your quip about stealing his own newspaper.

At 2/18/2006 1:21 PM, Blogger AeronwyDiobhell said...

One of the best chapters yet. Had me giggling loudly enough my mom came to see what I was reading. (Visiting the 'rents for a few days.)

But it is very nice to see Cleveland is having a great date (so far *continues to read*). *looks around at the crowd and sheepishly raises her hand* I was thinking it... But wow, Cleveland gets vamped and he suddenly grows a backbone. Hopefully he'll keep it when he's cured, if he doesn't turn into a pile of ash first. *giggles at the shot of Cleveland rising from his coffin* Erm, uh, I think Eugene is a mite confused with his anger issues there?

Oh and in my game, the Strangetown Diva was a Fortune sim, so the Downtown NPCs aren't all Pleasure.

At 2/21/2006 1:37 PM, Blogger Alexis said...

That was great! Those vampires are hard to keep happy, aren't they? Too bad about his permanent fear of being cured--makes your job a bit more difficult. Very funny update--keep 'em comin'!

At 2/24/2006 1:40 PM, Anonymous Audrey said...

Oh, dear.. how FUNNY. This chapter had me cracking up. Especially all the furious going around. I REALLY wish they'd get a memory for becoming furious someone.. maybe documenting the REASON they're furious. It'd be interesting to know what caused Eugene to become furious with /himself/. I actually LOVE the blue of alien vampires. Are you going to kill Cleveland off and have him resurrected as an alien vampire zombie?

Awesome update, though.. can't wait for the next one!

At 3/12/2006 4:48 AM, Blogger j00ky said...

Keth you sure know how to keep us all laughing :)

This chapter was a mighty fine job!

At 2/03/2007 4:58 PM, Blogger suziesim said...

ohno! Not Carla the Countess! lol This boy has no luck at all! Huh? They're getting along? And a dream date, even?! Woot Cleve! :) Who knew you'd match up better with the undead? lol!
Ack - the red hearts & the Bite at the same time?! And he's knowledge, so he loves it, doesn't he?! *shakes head* No - they don't have the sense of a common knat! Whine about the burn & go stand in the sun again, why don't ya?! Somebody better spring for a coffin! rotf! Too true about the flannel sheep pj's!!
Poor Salina! You're just aspirational fodder today, aren't you? And Carla? What a fickle little Vamp you are! Too funny about all the furious levels in the room! And now she's trying to steal the paper?!! *snickers*

At 3/03/2007 11:54 AM, Blogger Heather said...

Hilarious! So is Cleveland going to stay a Vampire I wonder or will he be cured and can move on with his life. It is a little too bad Carla turned out to want Kasson too but Cleveland will find someone eventually.


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